Chronic Illness: What I Know for Sure

The harder the decision is for one to make, the more likely one will be susceptible to criticism. When we spend time with God, however, the world's opinion about our choice means less and less to us. Our own confidence in our choice, based on what we sought from God, becomes the most vital.

Life is full of choices. Some are black and white and we find that few people may question these decisions. When people do, we are able to defend them whole-heartedly, pointing out reasonable factors that helped us make this choice. Many choices, however, are not so clear, and only through prayer and soul-searching do we reach a conclusion.

I've noticed in my own life that when a decision seemed illogical to those around me, it was more likely a sign from God. In college, to choose a sorority over a Christian dorm brought criticism not so much to myself as to my mother. And yet I made my closest Christian friends within that new home, started a Bible study and led a few girls to Christ.

Some decisions are hard to make. We search God's Word and find that either options could honor Him. Which path does He want us to take? Through prayer, speaking with mentors, reading His Word, and a bit of intuition we find an answer that we believe is God speaking to us. And we make our choice.

Then comes the repercussions of making a decision that some see as being the opposite of God's will. We are asked to defend our choice, explain it. How does one explain God's voice?
Whether one is choosing radiation over chemotherapy, medication over herbal remedies, Christianity over New Age religion, or time spent with God over time spent with friends, one is often placed into a defensive position. Refuse to defend your choices that you have made based on God's leading.

When people doubt our choices, it can hurt. Draw close to God; abide in Him and He will take that pain away. In time, those around you may discover that your choice was made through your faith and seeking God's will, not on earthly explanations or logical life-plans. These same people may even come to you when they have to make a life-changing decision that they can be confident in when others question their choice. -Lisa Copen

In thinking about suffering while working on an article, I naturally started listing things that I knew for sure. I hope that these are things that you know for sure and that you can rely on during difficult times.

God has planned a special purpose for my life. (Jeremiah 11:29a)
God is not out to get me or mess with my life just for the fun of it. I should not fear His plans (Jeremiah 29:11b)
God does not waste our suffering.
I will never understand God completely or His reasons for what He does or allows.
Jesus really does always understand. He's been through it all in some shape or form.
God loves me, but His greatest desire is for me to become more like Christ, not to become more comfortable.
God is in control.
I can do all things only through Christ who strengthens me.
God wants my time.
God is more interested in who I am than what I do, but He also desires for me to produce fruit and share Him with others.
As a person with an illness I am not exempt from picking fruit, rather, God is expecting me to ask Him to carry my basket.

We all have a soul that needs to dance!

Imagine you and the Lord Jesus are walking down the road together. For much of the way, the Lord's footprints go along steadily, consistently, rarely varying the pace. But your footprints are a disorganized stream of zigzags, starts, stops, turnarounds, circles, departures and returns.

For much of the way, it seems to go like this, but gradually your footprints come more in line with the Lord's, soon paralleling His consistently. You and Jesus are walking as true friends!

This seems perfect, but then an interesting thing happens: Your footprints, that once etched the sand next to Jesus', are now walking precisely in His steps. Inside His larger footprints are your smaller ones, safely you and Jesus are becoming one.

This goes on for many miles, but gradually you notice another change. The footprints inside the large footprints seem to grow larger. Eventually they disappear altogether. There is only one set of footprints; they have become one. This goes on for a long time, but suddenly the second set of footprints is back. This time it seems even worse!

Zigzags all over the place. Stops. Starts. Deep gashes in the sand. A veritable mess of prints. You are amazed and shocked. Your dream ends.

Now you pray: "Lord, I understand the first scene with zigzags and fits. I was a new Christian; I was just learning. But you walked on through the storm and helped me learn to walk with you." "That is correct."
"... and when the smaller footprints were inside of Yours, I was actually learning to walk in Your steps; followed you very closely." "Very good. You have understood everything so far."
"... when the smaller footprints grew and filled in Yours, I suppose that I was becoming like you in every way." "Precisely."
"So, Lord, was there a regression or something? The footprints separated, and this time it was worse than at first." There is a pause as the Lord answers with a smile in his voice. "You didn't know? That was when we danced." ~author unknown

If bars are more accessible than altars, if theaters are more welcoming than churches, if the producers of PBS are more sophisticated about communication access than our liturgists, if the managers of department stores know better how to appeal to those with disabilities than our church leadership, if the publishers of popular magazines are more knowledgeable about alternative formats than those who produce religious materials, then we have failed to meet Christ's challenge to us all. (Reprinted with permission Mary Jane Owens, "The Wisdom of Human Vulerability," The Disability Rag and Resources, Vol.14, No.3 May-June 1993, pg.19)

Be Part of the Solution!
Through the Accessible Congregations Campaign, a project of N.O.D.'s Religion and Disability Program, congregations in all 50 states are becoming physically and attitudinally accessible to members and guests with disabilities. The Campaign's theme, "Access: It Begins in the Heart," has motivated over 2,000 congregations nationwide to commit to opening their hearts, minds and doors to people with disabilities. If your church would like to be a part of the Accessible Congregations Campaign contact: the National Organization on Disabilities, Ginny Thornburg, at religion@nod.org, www.nod.org or (202) 293-5960.

Lisa Copen is the founder and director of Rest Ministries. She lives with rheumatoid arthritis and fibromyalgia and is the author of When Chronic Illness Enters Your Life Bible Study.