National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week

Discerning God's Will in Life with Chronic Pain & Illness

Maureen Pratt, author
Peace in the Storm

Maureen Pratt is an award-winning author, popular speaker, and syndicated columnist who focuses her work on prayer, faith, and living with chronic pain and illness. She is a patient herself, living with lupus, cardiovascular disease, asthma, and autoimmune thyroid disease (among other illnesses!). Her most recent book is, Peace in the Storm: Meditations on Chronic Pain & Illness.

Visit her website

Discerning God's Will in Life with Chronic Pain & Illness

Host_Mary_Shep: Welcome to the National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week seminar. My name is Mary (a.k.a. "shep" to many of you), and I'll be your host for this hour. We will open in prayer; then our guest will present the topic, after which there will be a question and answer period, then we will close in prayer.

Maureen Pratt is an award-winning author, popular speaker, and syndicated columnist who focuses her work on prayer, faith, and living with chronic pain and illness. She is a patient herself, living with lupus, cardiovascular disease, asthma, and autoimmune thyroid disease (among other illnesses!). Her most recent book is, Peace in the Storm: Meditations on Chronic Pain & Illness.

Her topic for today is: "Discerning God's Will in Life with Chronic Pain & Illness"

Thank you Maureen for your flexibility as we were a little off schedule a bit. Before we begin, let's ask the Lord's blessing upon our time and our speaker.

Father, we thank you for being a loving and caring Father. We trust that today is the day that the Lord has made and we will rejoice and be glad in it! We pray for those who are hurting today Lord, those who hurt physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Comfort them as they come to hear words of encouragement and love. Bless our speaker; guide the words that are spoken so that when we are done here, we will know that we have been in Your Presence. In Jesus precious name we pray, Amen.

Now, It is my pleasure to introduce Maureen Pratt!

Maureen, welcome and may the Lord bless you as you share with us today!

Maureen_Pratt: Thank you so much for inviting me this evening. I can hardly believe that we're at the end of National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week! It went by so quickly! Before I begin my topic, I'd like to thank Lisa, Liz, Mary and all the other members of the team who put this week together. Good work, everyone!

For those of us who've sat in on one or more workshop this week, we no doubt have lots of thoughts and notes and many more additions to our "to do" lists going forward. This evening's topic, "Discerning God's Will in a Life of Chronic Pain and Illness," will, I pray, give a good context for sifting through all of the things we've collected this week, and give us a solid foundation to continue to witness and do good work, God's work, in the days and months and years ahead.

Now, at some point, as we live with chronic pain & illness, each of us will ask the question, "Why, God? What do I do with this life now?" We and others have ready answers (so we think!) Some people will say, "God doesn't want you to be sick/in pain; if you're not cured, then there's something wrong with you." or, "God wants you to do x/y/z with your life -- He told me to tell you." or, simply, "You should..."

Yes, people will say almost anything to us! But the truth is that discerning God's will is a very personal thing. Others might have their own ideas of what we should be doing, and what our illness means. But only we hear the quiet voice of God in our souls, directing us and supporting us as we live. Only we need to answer to God if we are not doing his will. Only we can feel the supreme comfort and joy when we are journeying along the path he has forged for us. Which brings us back to the question of, "Why?"

I cannot imagine anyone who wants to live with chronic pain or illness. But suffering is part of the human experience. Even our Lord suffered. Remember his prayer in the Garden? "Father, if it be your will, let this cup pass from me." (Jesus, in his humanness, did not want to suffer.) But then, he said, "But not my will, but yours be done." Rather than keep asking, "why?", the point we need to come to is the point that Jesus came to in the garden. It's the point where we accept where we are today, not where we were years ago, before illness, and not where we want to be tomorrow. Discernment begins with today.

This doesn't mean that we reject the possibility that God will cure us (He can, anytime). It also doesn't mean that God abandons us today because we're in pain and suffering (He never abandons us). It means we wholeheartedly embrace God's working in our lives. It means that we accept that we are human, very finite, and that God is God. Infinite.

As we accept our today, we're ready for the next step in the journey of discernment: Truly opening ourselves to hear God in our hearts and in our souls. In practical terms, this means that we have to take time to be still, pray, study Scripture, and listen -- all of which can be difficult if our lives are filled with activity, health-related or otherwise. This week, alone, besides the things we usually do, we've taken in many words of wisdom in the workshops that are part of NICIAW -- think of how long it will take to digest all of this!

One way that we can carve out the time and space that we need is to treat our prayer and discernment time like one of our medical appointments, or daily doses of medicine. I approach my exercise time like this -- it's medicine that my doctor orders. I make sure that I take time each day to be quiet and listen to God -- in addition to prayer time and reading Scripture.

Another way to open ourselves to God is by keeping fellowship with people who are encouraging and nurturing in the spirit -- people who will not only compliment you on how you look (that's an inside joke for those of us who "look so good!"), but who will also encourage you to take time for yourself and for your spiritual growth. There are plenty of things and people in this world who will try to tear us from the Lord. We need to be judicious about the time we spend with people who denigrate or discount our faith.

Besides creating an environment around us that is conducive to God, we also need to bring God with us everywhere. This is truly one of the things that God wills for us. So, if you have to wait in the doctor's lobby, instead of fretting about the waiting time, spend more time in prayer. If you're exercising, lift up the activity to God and use the time to exercise spirit and body alike. And if you're flat on your back in pain, remember God is with you then, just waiting for you to turn to Him and open up a conversation.

Some people look at discerning God's will in their lives as a tangible pursuit. "Does God want me to be a teacher?" "Does God want me to be a missionary?" "Does God want me to buy this house?" "Does God want me to fire my doctor and hire another one?" Some people who have had to stop working because of illness have said that the most difficult thing about it was not so much the illness, but the loss of their identity in the workplace. They could no longer say, "I'm an accountant," or "I work in sales."

I understand this -- when I was diagnosed with lupus, I had to immediately stop working. It was jarring, something like having a great shock in my life (besides the shock of the diagnosis). But something that stopped me from dwelling on that particular loss was the knowledge that, above any job or activity, degree or certification, or familial relationship, I am a child of God. And I am part of the Kingdom. More important than any career is our walk with the Lord and our eternal salvation.

When we put our lives in the Lord's context, and in his hands, then we can truly begin to discern his will for us. And our questions will change accordingly. We will go from, "Does God want me to be a flight attendant," to "How can I best serve God, and with what gifts?" As we pray for greater knowledge about God's will, it's important to turn from the tangible things (jobs, where we live, etc.) to beginning with, and to turn from the "I want." Yes, of course we want to do his will. But when we pray, "I want the pain to go away," or "I want to win the lottery," and if we dwell on those things, we won't be able to truly listen to God and follow his true way for each of us.

The handout contains several questions to get you started, individually, in focused, quiet discernment. It begins by asking, "What are your gifts?" By this, I mean what are your strengths? What has God given you in terms of character personality, spirit and talent that are uniquely you? (And no thinking, "I'm useless because I'm sick." That's simply not true!).

Perhaps your gifts manifest themselves in your ability to bring calm and peace to a charged situation. Perhaps you can bring humor and lift spirits in a difficult, painful situation? Perhaps you have an affinity for communication -- and can assist others in coming to greater understanding about what is possible with their physical challenges? Each gift that you possess can be transformed into tangible, productive activities, activities that can be used to help yourself and others -- and that can spread God's love.

The second question is, perhaps, the most difficult. "How do your pain & illness hide your gifts from others?" Another way of posing the question is, "Do you allow your physical condition to overshadow the wonderful child of God that you are? How do you do this? How can you see and act beyond it?"

There are various ways in which we might stymie ourselves from reaching the potential that God wants for us. We might think we cannot use a particular gift because it might offend someone. Cause us pain. "Look" or "sound" funny. And yet, going to the third question, our gifts are not meant to be hidden.

"How can you use your gifts to be of service to others today?" This question is directly compatible with Jesus' imperative that we love one another. A gift, like a light, that is hidden is no use to anyone. And it's also no good if we wait for the "right moment," or the day when we won't be in pain. We need to ask, "How can we use our gifts - TODAY?"

The fourth question encourages us to revisit the notions of accepting illness and pain, opening ourselves up to God, and discerning his will. We remember, as we do this, that we're called to be in the world, but not of the world (remember how we identify with jobs instead of qualities?). In what way can we not try to lead God, but rather be led by him? Discerning God's will for us does not lead to an "aha!" moment, where everything is clear forever and ever. Nor does it entail understanding many gifts and facets of our lives as Christians all at once. Rather, it is a journey for a lifetime.

At moments, we will feel ourselves pulled from the journey (our society likes to do this as much as it can). This is why the fourth question is one that we should have at the ready -- as a way to pull us back into God's sphere of influence. Understanding our gifts, desiring to use them in service to others, taking care of the lives that God has given us -- each of these are things that we can do to move farther along our journey in discernment.

Illness is not good, nor evil. It just is. It's part of our humanness, part of living on the earth. It's what we do with our lives, today, that matters -- and sets the groundwork for what we will do tomorrow, too!

I hope this is helpful for you as you journey. I look forward to your questions, now, and to keeping in touch with you as this day ends and time unfolds.

migraine-man: For a long time I was frustrated - "Just think of how much I could accomplish if I wasn't sick!" I realized one day that I had it all wrong. Everyone has limitations - God gives us our strengths and weaknesses for a purpose. We always have power in Him to accomplish what He wants us to do. Realizing that made a big difference to me.

Maureen_Pratt: That's so true, and again goes back to understanding that we have but one life, the life we have now, and it's limited, as are all lives. God understands this - and how wonderful that we're called to be, "super people," but not "SUPERPEOPLE!"

Donna: I appreciated your comments about the "loss of identity." Too often we think of ourselves in terms of what we "do" instead of who we "are" -- God's beloved child. Thank you for underscoring that, Maureen. *S*

Maureen_Pratt: You're welcome, Donna. We can appreciate the things we accomplish and the degrees or certifications or other "badges" of accomplishments. But each of those things, no matter how precious, is not at all what we are as human beings. We're each more special than that!

Shep: I know we have many truly difficult situations as people who live with chronic illness, but indeed, we are still blessed. Even still, we can pray, send a card, make a call, or do the many other things that we wish someone would do for us... reaching out seems to help me feel better on the inside. Besides, for me, it seems a better choice than focusing on what I cannot do.

Maureen_Pratt: I agree completely, Shep. And another thing we can keep in mind -- we don't need to do huge, elaborate things for others to spread God's love. In fact, sometimes the smallest of gestures can mean more, so much more. I'll tell a little story. There's a house along the route I like to walk, and the man who owns it grows an amazing garden.

One day, I was walking by and happened to catch him as he was watering his front yard. I'd never met him before, so I stopped and introduced myself. I told him how wonderful it was to see his garden each time I walked by, and how good he was at growing lovely variety year-round. I thought he was going to burst into tears! He told me that there was a woman in the neighborhood who, every year, stole flowers from his yard -- a variety of flowers that he treasured and that were difficult to grow. He said that, that very morning, he'd discovered she'd done it again, and there were only a few stragglers left behind.

The man told me that he was just thinking that he might as well give up his garden, if it was going to be vandalized like that. And then I stopped and thanked him. Only thanked him. And that, he told me, made him feel so good that someone appreciated the garden that he just might keep it going for awhile longer. I had no idea that two simple words, "Thank you," could change the course of action in someone's life! Wow! I sure know it now.

beth: Hi, Maureen. Thanks for the email reminding me of your seminar! Your words, "it's a journey for a lifetime" are very helpful; I think I have been waiting for the "aha" moment and/or the day I'm not in pain, etc. instead of going with what God is trying to say to me.

Maureen_Pratt: Oh, Beth (you're welcome, by the way), we could sit around for years waiting for that "aha!" moment! I think part of that is a function of the times we live in. Lots of stories about becoming an instant millionaire, an overnight star, etc. Nope, our journey is much more subtle and ultimately much more rewarding.

Schatze: I would like to strongly recommend your outstanding book, Peace in the Storm, to everyone participating in this event. It has been a tremendous source of strength for me and has drawn me closer to God, for which I am very grateful to you, Maureen.

Maureen_Pratt: Thank you so very much! You know, "Peace in the Storm" began shortly after I was diagnosed with lupus. I would pray and read Scripture and, because of the brain fog, I'd forget my prayers and forget where I'd read what in Scripture. I started writing everything down and, after a few years, the book took shape. I am so very humbled and happy that it's helping others so much -- and you, dear sister!

Angie: Excellent story, Maureen. Thank you for sharing. You have given us so much to think about in regards to this 'new life' we must lead.

Maureen_Pratt: Thank you. I'm still learning a lot, each day. Actually, it makes life that much more exciting - new things all the time!

socaljoan: Hi, Maureen,

Great talk! This is Joan. Sorry I have had so many interruptions and missed some things. Just wanted to let everyone know how great your book PEACE IN THE STORM is and I HIGHLY recommend it. It is very comforting and helpful. It is also great for family members and friends to understanding the nature of chronic illness.

Maureen_Pratt: Thank you, Joan! I have heard others comment that "healthy" people can learn from Peace in the Storm, too. That's such a blessing to know! Through our illness, we often find ourselves educating others -- sometimes it can be frustrating! This, too, is another part of our journey.

beth: I have to echo schatze's words, if you haven't experienced Maureen's book, you are missing out on a very enriching experience!!

Maureen_Pratt: Thank you -- and Praise God for his gifts!

Karen: I like the garden story. I believe in the little things more than the big. I went to Russia (hours or travel-lots of money as it was a personal mission trip-they wanted me but could not pay) and I felt like my words were a drop in a bucket of needs. But as people hugged me and thanked me I knew I spoke to the ones God wanted me to speak to. I can't do everything, but I can focus on what I am called to do each moment.

Maureen_Pratt: Karen, that is so true. And you know, you probably touched other people who did not immediately respond to what you had to say. For some, God's work takes time to "sink in." Nothing we do in His name is ever in vain!

Cindy: God used you in a big way! We truly overcome darkness by sharing the Light and His fruit of the Spirit. Thank you for that story! It reminds us that giving even the smallest of gestures can make a difference!

Maureen_Pratt: It sure can, Cindy!

Donna: You mentioned that it's what we do today that sets the groundwork for what we will do tomorrow. I agree. If we spend too much time looking back and grieving the past, or too much time wishing for a future healing, we will miss out on the present -- and that's where we live. As you said, we need to be attuned to God in the "now" and see what He wants us to do "as we are" not how we wish we were.

Maureen_Pratt: Hi, Donna. Yes, we can spend too much time with the past. Of course, accepting our illness and pain comes out of moving through the mourning process, and we will, naturally, feel sadness, anger -- all the emotions associated with mourning. But today is ours. And today is what we need to work with.

bluefinch: Maureen, how do you figure out what your 'gift' is? I have repeatedly been diagnosed with multiple illnesses last few years and most recently chemical sensitivity. I am unable to go anywhere and now unable to work. Honestly, I feel pretty worthless right now and not having too much luck with my family understanding either.

Maureen_Pratt: You do have many gifts, I feel certain. But right now, it might be difficult to see through the pain and other feelings you have to recognize them. I encourage you to continue to reach out through the Internet (isn't it wonderful that we can communicate with one another this way, even if we cannot go out?), perhaps explore ways that you can volunteer online (maybe with Rest Ministries -- I'm sure Lisa and her team would welcome helpers!). One step at a time, and one action at a time -- not a complete life change. And we'll certainly keep you in our prayers!

Schatze: Maureen, thank you so very much for your wonderful presentation. May God bless you for helping me.

Maureen_Pratt: Thank you!

Debbie: Thank you, Maureen, for an excellent seminar. There were times when I was sitting here going Amen! and Yes! Yes! Yes!

Maureen_Pratt: Bless you! God is awesome, isn't he?!

Host_Mary_Shep: Thank you all for coming - this is the last talk of the week - We hope you had a great time and May God Bless you - please, come back and visit Rest Ministries often at www.restministries.org. God Bless You all and thank you again for coming!

Now, Maureen would like to close the week in prayer - please stay and close the week together!

Maureen_Pratt: Heavenly Father, we are so very grateful for this time together. From all corners of the world, and from our individual experiences with a myriad of illnesses and pain, we are brought here, now, to this place, to reflect on your gifts and remember that you rule our lives.

This week, Lord, has been a true blessing. Thank you for the tireless work led by Lisa and carried out by her strong and patient team. Bless them, Lord, and give them lots of rest and relaxation so that they will also feel refreshed by the activities of this week and know that their labor has been so very much appreciated by all of us.

For each of us, Lord, we pray that your wisdom will feed us as we go forth from this place. We ask that we will be more accepting of our lives, and more open to recognizing the opportunities you place before us. We know that nothing is impossible when you are present -- and you are present in each of our lives always.

Father, you know what we need before we even ask for it. Help us, now, to rest with the knowledge that you are working, even as we sleep, and that you are comforting our souls, even as we experience the pain, isolation, and frustration that is living with chronic illness and pain.

Give us words to say to others when we're at a loss as to how to explain how we feel.

Let us find patience when we feel we're at the very edge of giving up.

And let us, each day, have the strength and courage to reach out to at least one other person in need. And to lift up praise, let joy flood our souls, and find your peace in all we do.

We pray this and all the prayers deep in our hearts in Jesus' name.

Amen!